Brother Mr. Slish commented on a post of Eb the Celeb's last week. It was THE. MOST. HONEST. & REAL. statement I've YET to hear ANY man utter! Thank U, Brother Slish for confirming ALL my thoughts on the subject of Men & Commitment (I deleted what was meant specifically for Eb & emboldened the point I've been trying to tell folk for years;-):
Mr.Slish said...
Listen to this old gangsta because I'm probably older than most of these cats..Men don't want to date a woman who behaves like a man..Not saying that you do but to say you date like one. You can think it but don't ever say it to a guy.
Men need to feel like men in a relationship. The fact that you're so cool and you watch sports is fantastic but don't let them know that until after you've made them work a little..If you act like you don't need to be wined and dined then they won't. You're lowering the bar for yourself by making it too easy for these boys calling themselves men.
Stop playing guessing games. If you like a dude let him know right away. The worst he could say is "I'm not feeling you." That ain't gonna kill you..If you keep playing the lets just kick it and see game. Eventually your psyche will be looking to dig your self a ditch to lay down in...
Now the biggest misnomer out there is that a woman can make a man commit..Not so.. He's already decided before meeting you. So in other words women just happen to be in the right place and the right time.
Take your time -- love will eventually find you. Can't force or put a timetable on it...
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I don't know bruh Slish, but I needs to get to know anyone who speaks THIS MUCH TROOF!!! I wholeheartedly second all those emotions. Though I love sports as well as many other "typically guy things", there is soooooooo much more a man must tap into in order to capture my attention and ultimately my heart. In my mind, by expecting him to take some initiative and do the necessary work to find out what exactly those things are, I am allowing him to set the precedent that he is and more importantly WILL BE a man who feels strongly enough about me/us to DO WORK. The only way we as women can ever truly know whether the men we meet are capable of doing what is necessary and/or required is to get out the way and let them do it!!!
So very very on point Brother Slish!
Lol, yeah that sounds about right.
Especially the part "Now the biggest misnomer out there is that a woman can make a man commit..Not so.. He's already decided before meeting you."
he was on point!!!
Oh you know I love this! I left EB's site with this post on my mind and on my heart. I swear I heard him whispering to me.
You know what I am always saying...there is no convincing in love.
Good posting Sister!
Excellent post by Slish...he speaks the truth!
I saw the post, but missed that comment. He said everything I was thinking and more as I read Eb's post though. REALLLLLL talk!
Slish you know you aint no old gangsta though...ha!!
I couldn't agree more. He hit the nail on the head. "Some" chicks try to act so cool and down to the point that it feels like you are being sold on her instead of coming to the realization that this is the chick you've been searching for.
Why Ya'll over here talking bout me...lol..
Dang! I missed a conversation THIS deep? At Eb's place ya say?
Man them are some definite truths there!
@ Mr. Slish, talkin' about ya? Where? It is all in the love!
yea i read this over @ her spot... this is easily 1 of the best and most real explanations yet...
Slish was givin' up real game wit that 1... much appreciated!
annnnd yea... uve been tagged (check my page for details)
Sistahs Sharon, Love, Miz & O Diva - Brother Slish was preachin' wasn't he!? Y'all KNOW i had to put this on FRONT for US cuz we NEED all the REAL talk from Brothers we can GET!
Brothers Clnmike, 12Kyle, Rich, 2nd 68 & G-sweet - glad to hear some more REAL MEN confirm his statement;-).
Brother Slish - u know it's ALL luv - cuz u spit REAL GROWN talk there;-).
Wow!! This is one of the most honest accounts I have read in a VERY long time. Brota was deinitely preaching. lol
I believe it's true (and have learned it the hard way) but, "So in other words women just happen to be in the right place and the right time," is hard to swallow.
hmmmm, i'm not feelin' bruh slish comments too well....it could be that i'm misinterpeting the comment too much:
simply put. who am I to determine what YOU feel towards me?
slish can't be no older than me and i'm 43 and even if he's 53 or older, black folx basically from the 70' on back lived in the same boat culturally. so much didn't change.
but my point is this....
MEN NEED TO FEEL LIKE MEN IN A RELATIONSHIP...men just need to be men, period. fuck the dumb shit. don't worry about what she's thinking, cause you really don't know. let your actions speak for you. if you diggin' her...wine her and dine her and do what's right (that's if she wants to do that, if not, maybe she ain't diggin' you?). if the money's tight, then maybe she wants to provide that dining experience. that's not her trying to be a man, that's just keeping shit real.
STOP PLAYING GUESSING GAMES....ladies before you immediately hit'em off with how you feel about him...slow your roll. understand him as a friend, FIRST. (if you want him to be a friend, it's your brain use it) how he does things? is he a procrastinator? is he good with kids, mother, people skills, easy to get jealous? check him out.
i really don't have a problem with a woman knowing more than me, cause in reality, and really look at the BIG picture, THE BLACK WOMAN is the backbone of this country if not this planet. many sisters right now, have to understand sports and other male-oriented things, not because she's trying to get a man, but because she may a son and/or daughter that are into sports and she wants to learn the game in order to support them cause daddy bounced and ultimately punk'd out.
as far as COMMITMENT...on both ends, there a lotta guys out that trying to lock shit down with a woman for her hard work/finances like insurance and then flip the script once he gets in to play the MAN role...which totally insecure, unecessary, because that's the reason she's with you to start with is because of the MAN in you. it's just that you didn't see it in yourself.
it's a back n forth tennis game on the subject, it's all about give n take, respect and lovin' the person that you're with.
Diva - I agree, I haven't seen that kind of honesty in too long!
Nicole - like cough medicine: hard to swallow, but will prevent more illness in the long run! LOL!
Lance - U don't haveta agree & of course the female has to be FEELin' the Brother who's seeking a wife - but in MY OWN experience: Brothers who wanna be married are going to FIND & MARRY an agreeable woman within their DESIRED time frame. Whereas, women will have a harder time finding an agreeable Brother when we want to be married. I've known SO MANY Brothers who went on to get married once we broke up ...
Let the church say, amen. I think my ex was out the week Slish gave this sermon. She might not be an ex if she was there.
"Brothers who wanna be married are going to FIND & MARRY an agreeable woman within their DESIRED time frame." -CapCity
...yeah, that's married life for you...sorta like Wil E. Coyote stepping off that mountain cliff while chasing after the Road Runner. whether it's jumpin' the broom or off a cliff.
it's over.....lol
I think thats pretty good advice. Also what lance said. I don't think either is wrong because every guy is different. But its good to hear from a guy's perspective & not just what we assume.
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